This is a guest post by Mathews McGarry giving simple steps of overcoming the disappointment in life.
It happens to all of us: as you cross the threshold of adulthood, responsibilities begin to multiply at the speed of light, the touch of magic gradually wanes, and before you know it, the world has turned into a grim, dull place you no longer want to be a part of. The path to happiness and success is a thorny one, and sometimes you will feel disappointed with the way it has all turned out: but no downer, however dark, should be an excuse for you to give up or settle for less. If you want to change your life around, you need to wave Goodbye to the habits that bring you down.
Happiness is a state of mind, not a state of life
Nothing ever goes according to your plans? Here is a newsflash: adulthood is not a joyride, but no amount of complaining can fix it. There will always be sources of displeasure: your house may be a meager bedsit in the suburbs and not a beachside villa; your job may be tedious and terribly underpaid; communication channels will get clogged by misunderstandings now and then, but hey – it happens to everyone. Happiness is not a state of life – it is a state of mind. Stop letting external circumstances run your emotional life: make the conscious decision to be happy even though nothing is perfect, or your mood will forever remain down in the gutters of misery and frustration. Take baby steps until you learn to run; just do not stop because once you do, your happiness will be as good as gone.
Do not let your ego weigh you down
Face it: it is not life that sucks, it is your vision of what it should be like that fuels your discontent. It gets worse: you often compare yourself to others, and you always seem to be on the losing end. Stop that immediately: people will be people, and some of them may be more successful or simply luckier than you, but your life has nothing to do with them. Ego is a big fat lie: like a hot air balloon, it deflates as soon as it hits the tiniest needle. Do not identify yourself with your job, your shape or your bank account – instead, regard these as your cohort on the path of life and do what you can every day to improve your company during the ride.
Focus on this particular moment
Yes, you had a sexy figure back in your high school years; your previous job was perhaps better than the current one; you really loved your ex and he/she still cheated on you. And still, none of these thoughts bear relevance to the present moment: remaining stuck in the past prevents you from enjoying life as it unfolds here and now, and such thinking can ruin your future, too. Instead of contemplating or sulking for hours on end, make a list of all the things you want to do before you die, and start doing them today – as depressing as this may sound, there is no guarantee tomorrow is coming your way.
Be a person of action, not reaction
Our emotions are often a reaction to external factors – but if all you ever do is react, no wonder you are disappointed with life. Take action: check your health, modify your diet, start working out and naturally boost your testosterone; learn a new skill, language, or take up a hobby; apply for that job now, or take a walk and chat up a neighbor just for fun’s sake. Responsibility for your life and choices is in your hands, so stop blaming the world for being cruel and start living as an independent adult.
Every change begins with a personal decision: you can shun life, or you can embrace it with all its good times and hardships. Choose wisely – after all, you live only once, so make it count. And remember: life is beautiful even when the colors are not all that bright.
Mathews McGarry is passionate about many forms of strength training, and has spent years lifting, dragging and flipping all manner of heavy objects. After graduating from the Faculty of Health Sciences, he started writing about his experiences, and sharing tips for a better life. He is an all-around fitness adviser and his words are strong as an Australian Bull.