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Happiness Tips by experts
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Tips for Stress free life > Expert Zone > Happiness Happiness Tips by experts |
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5 Keys to Understanding Why Your Life (probably) Sucks # 4
We are in constant competition If we take evolution seriously, then the reason why welasted this long (individually and as a race) stems fromthe fact we have adopted a survivor mentality. Eitherconsciously or unconsciously we subscribe to the "survivalof the fittest" mentality. That means we see everyone andeverything else as potential competitors. Whether thecompetition is about which political or religious systemoffers the best lifestyle or who has right of way inmerging traffic, the competitive mind set thrives onproving my way of doing things is better, or my wants aremore important, than yours. As a result we become driven to prove we are bigger,stronger, faster, smarter, richer, more important thaneveryone else. Even once we achieve that goal, we need tomaintain constant vigilance just in case someone elsesneaks past our guard and proves themselves to be bigger,stronger etc. This competitive nature happens on all levels,international, community or individual. It happens betweenhuman beings. It happens between the human race andnature. The first European settlers in my own country (Australia)had the policy: 'If it moves, shoot it; if it doesn't move,chop it down.' Any person who works on the land knows whatit's like to compete with the elements. On a community and international level, our competitivemindset leads to doubts and suspicions, fear and hatred. The only possible way that sort of thinking can lead isinto open conflict with the inevitable outcome ofdevastated lives. The same can be said of our relationship with theenvironment.If we only see ourselves in competition withit, having to subdue it, then 'it' will suffer and so willwe. The 'shoot it/chop it down' mentality of my forebearsmeansthere are vast tracts of land in this fragile countrythat are barren, desolate wastelands. The consequences are that we take on an attitude that "itis better to be safe than to be sorry" That means we stoptrying new things, and develop our lives as a safe fortressinto which we can retreat from the hostile environmentcalled life. We become suspicious of anything that is different fromus. So people of different ethnic origins from us, peoplewhohave different beliefs; people who have a different sexualorientation all challenge us by their very existence posespose a very real threat to our own existence. So, how do we deal with the mindset of competition?Whether it's with nature, or your fellow human beings, theanswer can best be summed up in one word; Co-operation. I'm talking about a mindset of co-operation as the firststep towards making your life less frustrating and moreenjoyable. Such a mindset begins with the realisation thateverything in your possession at this point in time cameinto being only as the result of many people'scontribution. Think about it for a while and you will seethat is true. The upshot of that is I need you to make yourcontribution, just as you need me to make my contributionso that together we might live more complete lives. We allneed each other. That came home to me very strongly one time when thelocal garbage collectors went on strike for betterconditions. As a result stinking, rotten garbage piled upin yards and in the street. It was a mess and made lifevery unpleasant for a while. A job as a garbage collector is probably not one that manypeople aspire to, but those people provide an invaluableservice, particularly in the throw-away society most of uslive in. But a change of mindset, from competition to co-operationcan only start with one person. You. In fact you are theonly person whose mind you can change. Trying to changesomeone else's mind only leads to trouble. You may findyou need some help, but the first step, is to realise itIS possible and if you choose, you CAN do it. Hey, that's two steps! Because the first step in anything is always the hardest, you're already a significant way along the path to a betterlife. Graham Hunt is the founder of Prentis Carpenter Center, an organisation established to resource an environment where those people who chose to do so could discover and work towards their potential. One way in which Graham is doing that is through his website http://www.higher-self-esteem-site.com/ Drop by anytime.
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