Happiness tips

   Tips for Stress free life  >  Expert Zone   > Happiness

       Happiness Tips by experts


Why We Have Problems? A Coach Debates


As a coach, I often ask myself the question why human beings have problems. With the exception of terminal diseases, serious illnesses that are REALLY life-threatening situations and serious stuff, we do have problems for a number of reasons I will present below. But first of all, allow me, I will have to replace the word problem by "challenge" or "barrier" as used in the coaching jargon. Problems do not exist in the coaching world! However, changing the word, does not change the concept so a challenge, barrier or problem is pretty much the same thing.

Here are the four main reasons we have problems - illness excluded:

1. Unclear intentions and objectives.

In other words, confusion in our head that shows in our daily life. When we are not clear about our objectives in life, career or business, our thoughts are scattered rather than solid. Scattered thoughts do not lead to significant action taking but to stillness or mess. Example: you want to quit your job because you want to start a business. At the same time you want to take a gap year to travel the world and you also want to make more money and possibly to write a book and to loose weight. Great!

What actions will you take if you are in a similar situation as the one described above? There is so much in the mind that it is difficult to take any action. Or you will work simultaneously on so many and possibly conflicting projects and you won't get the desired results.

Solution: Clarify your intentions. Be clear of what you want to create in your life by, first, asking your heart. What do you truly desire? An intention is something that gives you joy, enhances your creativity and also brings cash (if it is work related intention) but contributes to society at the same time. An intention is bigger than you. Pick one at the time. Focus on it, develop it, work on it. Then move to the next one. If you don't know how to go about choosing the number one intention, use the "commitment scale" exercise. Example: I want to take a gap year to travel the world. Fine. What is your level of commitment on a scale from 1 to 10? Anything less than 6 is out of your list. You will be surprised that you actually do not have so many intentions after all!

2. Lack of reserves in all areas.

What is a reserve? "Having enough of" the dictionary defines. Scarcity has always been one of the major issues in humans. When there is not enough of, there is scarcity and as a consequence frustration. Worry and stress. Problems! What are the main areas we need to build and maintain reserves in order to be satisfied?Here are my suggestions:

MoneyFoodHeatTimeSpaceLoveResourcesEnergyOpportunity

Obviously, there are many different other areas we can build reserves as well (friends, enthusiasm etc). We can all find out our weakest areas and then work on them.

Solution: Start building reserves in all areas. From reserves of bread to reserves of love, you need them all to find happiness. Or stop worrying. Fear will disappear, you won't have to struggle, everything will be in place and you will enjoy life more. You will have more time and more space. Things will start coming to you effortlessly and you will become attractive. Building reserves is one of the first steps of attraction

3. Resisting the present.

Resisting the present means that humans beings do not like to be in the present. For a mysterious and unexplainable reason, most of us spend more time in the past or look forward into the future. It's an unconscious or conscious choice but in either case, creates frustration and often overwhelm. If you don't want to be in the present, you are not grounded, you are not "here" but somewhere else. If you decided to be in the past, you spend most of your time thinking of what has happened and how difficult or easy your life has been so far. Old wounds, faces and emotions come up from the old days and you are just living in the past-world. If you have, however, decided to be in the future, you spend most of your time organizing your future plans and goals. Thinking of what is next for you. Future goals and plans are on the top of the agenda. The "what is next" question might create excitement, but it creates the "need" of a better future.

Solution: Recognize perfection in the present. It might not be ideal or desired but the present is a wonderful place to be. Being in the present, it's a learning experience. When you can see perfection in the present, even in a very difficult situation, you are probably oriented to improve or resolve it.

And don't forget, life happens when you make plans.

4. We want things to happen now, ASAP. Even if we don't exactly know what they are.

Does it mean that we are not patient? Yes. Does it mean that we can't wait? Yes. It also means that we can't see that there is a need for preparation for everything we want to have, develop or create. Things do not happen when we want them, but when we are ready. I remember one of my first clients wanted to get a job in London and relocate from France. When she made the decision, she had one year left before her graduation from University, as a mature student. She did not have a degree as yet. Despite her effort and job applications for London jobs, she couldn't get one. She got a job, somewhere else, a year after. It was then when she was prepared and ready.

Solution: Don't rush. The Universe has its own time. The Universe is ready when you are.

Thei Zervaki is a career and business coach and founder of the Ditch your Resume? portal (http://www.ditchyouresume.com). She coaches individuals who don't like to edit resumes and don't know what to do when they grow up. She also delivers fun workshops. Email her at tzervaki@ditchyouresume.com


MORE RESOURCES:

See the complete list of Articles on Happiness here

Have a look at Best Selling Books on Happiness

 

Google

See also : Other articles on

Depression, Happiness, Humor, Inspirational, Motivation,
Positive Attitude
,  Meditation, Spirituality


 

Latest info on : Happiness

 


Cost of happiness might not be measured in mileage
Dallas Morning News, TX - 2 hours ago
For me, if the cost of happiness is less than what many people spend on their morning Starbucks, I'll keep my car – and just keep cussing Big Oil.


The Free Lance-Star

Happiness: Is it as easy as a smile?
Chicago Tribune, United States - Jul 4, 2008
When I hear the phrase "the pursuit of happiness"—that inalienable right we celebrate on the 4th of July—I think instantly of one thing. ...
Freedom guaranteed, happiness yours to pursue Indianapolis Star
We may pursue happiness, as individuals The Free Lance-Star
How the will of the people is creating a new democracy in music Independent
The Chattanoogan - Denver Post
all 12 news articles


Gangloff: relief, then happiness
The Plain Dealer - cleveland.com, OH - 1 hour ago
Gangloff said it took a day for happiness to set in. He said he was "pretty pleased" with his races, but thought the final was slow for he and winner ...


Nudge: Improving Decisions About Wealth and Happiness by Richard H ...
Times Online, UK - 11 hours ago
Doctors need organs for transplant. How do they persuade people to commit to donation after their death? They might ask them to tick a box opting into organ ...
Political leaders line up to learn new art of persuasion Times Online
all 2 news articles


HUMAN MATTERS: Truly selfless love means 'your happiness is all I ...
Las Vegas Review - Journal, NV - 1 hour ago
Your happiness is not all I want ... unless your happiness makes me happy! 2008. There's this relationship in my life. Been there a long while, actually. ...


Pursuit of Happiness
Seattle Post Intelligencer - Jul 4, 2008
Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. That's what all the fireworks and parades celebrate on this Fourth of July holiday, but this celebration ...


The pursuit of happiness, unity
York Daily Record, PA - 5 hours ago
Others have speculated -- and biographies of Mr. Franklin certainly confirm it -- that Mr. Franklin placed a high value on the pursuit of happiness. ...


The Flint Journal - MLive.com

Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness? This Independence Day ...
The Flint Journal - MLive.com, MI - 4 hours ago
The Declaration of Independence states that our rights include "Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness," but too often we have acted like spoiled ...


Life, love and the pursuit of happiness
Killeen Daily Herald, TX - 4 hours ago
A true existentialist, Mikell has opened my eyes to her fresh take on life, love and the pursuit of happiness and helped me to assume the existentialist way ...


NDTV.com

Happiness rising in Canada: international survey
CTV.ca, Canada - Jul 2, 2008
It found that the happiness index rose in an "overwhelming majority" of countries studied, including Canada. Denmark came out on top as the happiest country ...
Survey reveals world of happiness, discontent Chicago Tribune
Happiness Is Rising Around The World, According To New Study Science Daily (press release)
Denmark Ranks No. 1 In Happiness WPXI.com
MLive.com - CNN
all 210 news articles

Happiness - Google News

Why not be an expert yourself  ?

 If you can write on any of the above topic, you are welcome to submit your
 articles in our database :

 Submit your article here   Our Article Area

You are here Home > Tips for Stress free Life > Useful articles on Meditation


| Meditation Article Home | All articles on Meditation-complete list 

 Main Home | | Meditation Corner

                |Health Tips  | Workplace Tips  | Soul Tips  |

Recommend us  |

 Books, DVDs and accessories on meditation & yoga  |

[About us] [Contact] [Privacy Policy]

Copyright 2006, Meditation is Easy.com, All rights reserved