Tips for Stress free life > Expert Zone > Goal Setting
Goal Setting Tips by experts
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Tips for Stress free life > Expert Zone > Goal Setting Goal Setting Tips by experts |
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Goal Setting - The Facts Behind The Fiction
To have hopes and dreams for the future is a wonderful idea. If you want to call them 'goals' that's fine also but do learn to get things in perspective. They are NOT achieved in the way you have been led to believe. The much talked about conscious mind, subconscious mind, the will, belief patterns, etc. are simply descriptions of mental procedures and do not exist in isolation, as many people believe. They are all part of the same 'mental cooperative'. Ah, there lies the rub! The moment you set a goal you instantly cause an 'inner conflict' to take place between various departments of this mental cooperative. This is unavoidable due to the way we were brought up, our parents, how we were educated, where we grew up, our religious beliefs or lack of them. The list is almost endless. All these factors make up our core beliefs. These beliefs give rise to our very own particular and personal creative patterns of thought which dictate our own individual realities which, in turn, give life to our very own set of 'Living Laws'. 'Living Laws' means laws that we follow, in other words, adhered to, for the sake of leading a 'normal' acceptable life. But it also means that they have a life of their own and can be changed, amended or completely abolished to make way for new ones. Each one of us has a set of these laws. Some of the laws you live by are similar to other people's but never 100% - that's what makes us individuals. Sure, we are all human beings - but we are NOT the same. We are all different, albeit only slightly, but we all differ. The inner conflict arises when what I call 'The Judge' evaluates, compares and checks out your goal to see if it is valid. That is to say, if it complies with your current set of internal laws. When your goal is found to be contravening these laws, for whatever reason, and reasons you are very rarely aware of, it is immediately and unceremoniously overruled and thrown out of court with no hope of appeal. The secret to achieving our goals, therefore, is to cause a new creative pattern of thought and thereby amend our current set of Living Laws. We must become an active and willing member of the cooperate.We must, in fact, cooperate with the cooperative! The modern day idea that you can use visualization techniques or repeat endless affirmations in order to change these laws and therefore The Judge's mind is totally erroneous - it will not make the slightest difference. This is totally misguided thinking. Sure, after many years of constant repetition of your affirmations/visualizations you may eventually get some reaction from The Judge even if it takes a lifetime, that's if they don't lock you away in a funny farm first! -------------- Before we go any further let's just take a look at these beliefs and where they come from and see why they are so darn difficult to change. It's all very well being told to change our beliefs and we will change our lives but just how do we do it? We know from experience that simple visualization doesn't work, nor do affirmations or anything else for that matter. So, what's the answer? The DNA of beliefs are MEMES (pronounced as in cream). Memes are a relatively new discovery and seldom, if ever, talked about in books or courses about personal success and achievement. Why? If memes are the very foundation of our personality why are they never mentioned? The main reason is that few people actually understand how they work or the significance they have in our everyday lives. The dictionary defines a meme as "a unit of cultural information, such as a cultural practice or idea, that is transmitted verbally or by repeated action from one mind to another" Memes have been likened to viruses and the comparison is indeed very apt. The Oxford zoologist Richard Dawkins defines memes as a set of ideas that can replicate itself like a virus and spread from one brain to another. For example, it took only 300 years for the meme of Christianity to overrun the Roman Empire and less than 130 years for the meme of communism to "infect" 1.8 billion people across the face of the Earth. So you can imagine that memes such as: "life's a constant struggle", "there ain't no free meals in this life", "money doesn't grow on trees" etc. etc. and all that these silly memes represent (that life is not easy and you have to constantly struggle to make ends meet) have had many generations to set up home in our psyches and become part of our everyday lives. Besides, it's got to be true - our parents said so! Memes come in all shapes and sizes. Some are relatively innocent, such as the 'hula-hoop meme', 'the pet rock meme' and 'music memes' normally associated with a particular race or creed. But some are extremely dangerous and far from innocent. I don't wish to enter into the religio-political arena, so, suffice it to say that the 'religion memes' and the 'political memes' are particularly virulent and in some cases deadly! ---------- Memes then form what are known as PARADIGMS. A paradigm is "a set of assumptions, concepts, values and practices that constitutes a way of viewing reality for the community that shares them." We must be very clear on the understanding of the power of paradigms and how they affect us in order be able to exercise our right of free choice. For, whatever paradigms we choose to accept determine the form or our perceptions, which in turn shape our decisions, actions, experiences, social systems, worlds and futures. If you don't understand just how much of a grip paradigms have on your life and shaping your experiences then you will be under the impression that you and the world are set in stone and there's nothing you can ever do to change that. Ian S.N. Randall
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